Amarok12/21/14 09:01 pm: A Thousand LutesAnonymous

Great... Aragorn at his best... hehe... understatement much...? How he simply refuses to give a name for example..., and with true regret simply says that other duties kept him from working as healer... just great! I like Ayman as well.

I must have missed that little gem at fanfiction.net, even though I read all your Haradrim-related stories with enthusiasm and much delight. Thank your for creating that world within a world.


Michelle06/18/13 09:33 pm: To Save or to SalvageSigned

Easier roads were for other Men, after all.

I hope you let me steal this and incorporate it into my collection life mottos. I love that sentence! On the one hand so active and positive and "let's do this", and on the other hand kind of resigned. Just great!

Also, I enjoyed revisiting that verse - and I saw there's more to come. I'm looking forward to that, too:)


Ellynn06/06/13 01:06 pm: The Wizard and the GoatherdSigned

I like your portrait of Gandlf a lot. ;)


babschwi06/06/13 12:27 am: The Wizard and the GoatherdAnonymous

oh, I enjoyed your little tale very much. Your description of Gandalf and his worries about Aragorn (I do love angst) were excellent! I hope you write more in this particular setting ( Ransom and Strangers and this)!! Thank you so much for writing...


ich bins05/29/13 04:28 pm: StrangersSigned

How could I miss the first upload of this story? Anyways, I have noticed now, that you have posted the sequel and found 2 chapters- it's like christmas! 

I like how you play with different styles of writing. I have to admit, that I usually prefer longer stories in a style like you used it in ransom, because if you read of the event itself and not of how somebody else tells it afterwards it's easier to feel as if you were inside the story, but I enjoyed the points of view you gave in this story nevertheless. I could imagine what happend pretty well and through your way of telling I got somehow an additional impression of the people of Harad and living there and the storietellers. It gave me 100% of sitting-in-an-inn-and-listening-to-an-old-guy-blabble-feeling, but then again what he was talking about was really hard to swallow. I'm digressing, sry. I like your style, even if it is not the one I usually prefer and I think it's great how you are able to change from one style to another and play with them just the way you like and the way which is perhabs the best for the story. You are a great storyteller!

The firsth story-teller is great (reminds me a bit of Butterbur) and how you made him tell the story (not streight to the point, but still at the end of the chapter the reader knows everything). And the second is very interessting to, less sympathic, but his story-telling was exciting (as was the firsth). I can imagine both charakters very well, they seem very 3D and realistic.

And like always I love your Aragorn. Unendingly noble and dignified, but still shrewd - the "All the honer he deserves" statement was great and so...Aragornish. (I always imagined he answerd question refered to himself in this still when he was Thorongil.)

So till now the story has been like all the stories I have read of you so far: remarkable well written; with exceptional good characterisations; exciting and haunting - and absolutely not the right thing to read as goodnight-story (like I sometimes do with other fanfictions); and overall just marvelous.

I am looking forward to more. 



Author's Response:

Thanks for the wonderful review!

Yeah, I tried to push myself a little with this one by playing around with a very different style.  I wanted to build this story around the theme of legacy--how he'd be remembered in Harad, if he'd be remembered, what kinds of consequences his actions would have.  Additionally, telling it as I did allowed me to get the story out there in a reasonably short fic.  If I'd written it all with the level of detail that I use in most of my fics, each of these chapters might end up at least as long as "Ransom."  While I know some authors who can crank out that kind of work in a month, I'm not one of them.  ;)

That being said, I'm playing around with an Aragorn-POV version of this story which I may someday post.  It's difficult not just because of the length and the world-building required, but also because the events of this fic (particularly the first chapter) tend to be very dark.  The "storyteller" narration allowed me to distance myself from that, but writing it from Aragorn's POV is much more painful.  Still, I'm enjoying where that story is going, so we'll have to see what comes of it.

The last chapter of this fic should be up within a few days.  It's a bit more immersive than the first two (and also much *longer*).  I hope you enjoy it!

-Brennan


Michelle05/20/13 02:17 pm: RansomSigned

I've enjoyed this story so very much!! I've had so little time lately to read fanfic (let alone longer stuff), so this story put me right back into the mood why I love LOTR fic. I could read endlessly about Aragorn's adventures in far-off countries, but that you decided to tell the story from Hakim's point of view gave the fic an interesting twist. And of course, the moment when he finally realizes that the King is actually Dakheel was priceless. I was basically cheering:)



Author's Response:

Thank you for the wonderful review!  This was my first time writing in one of the "far-off countries," and it was both more rewarding and way more of a challenge than I was expecting.  I'm so glad you enjoyed the finished product!

 

-Brennan


ich bins05/09/13 07:06 pm: To Save or to SalvageSigned

It's nice, that you give us insight in Azzam's mind. In "Ransom" I have already seen, that he is a complex charakter, but now I understand his person better. At least I know more, how he tries to "save" Aragorn is... queer (I hope that's the word), but you show us his desperation really good. Who knows what man are capeable of doing, if they fear for their family?
I also liked the mention of his time as soldier. There have been hints before, indicating he didn't like it and doesn't what to think about it or have Hakim facing the same. Reading about Azzam think about this -even thogh it was just a little hint- and his thoghs about not having hurt somebody since than were very well placed and fascinating to read- like generally Azzam's thoghs and actions. 
And for some reason I found it great to read about his thoghts of Aragorn (or Dakheel) as "Proud, stubborn Dakheel with his quiet dignity". Azzam is "grumbling" about this foreigner who "made him" do so much things he never wanted, but still Azzam can't overlook Aragorn's dignity. 

Reading about Aragorn's decision-making was really exciting. I knew what would come out of it, but I like that you show even Aragorn is struggling with this decision. A really, really hard decision, which I think hardly anybody else would have made and this choise is even more remarkable if you keep in mind, that he finds out how to get himself free and later (with Hakim's help) he even has a commensurate chance to flee and survive and everything without telling anybody his name. (I think doing what you have to do and bearing everything if you are forced or at least commanded to is easier that decide on your own while having other, much more confortable choices and guys around you who try to get you to do something else.) I would have run by firsth chance and never endure all of that, but fortunately for Middle earth that's not how Aragorn is.
Seeing Aragorn as a kind of Messiah was awesome. His "I forgive you" made me shiver and I still do not know if it was because of joy vor Azzam or admiration or love for Aragorn or something different, but it was not just a strong sentece from Aragorn, but also said at the exactly right place in the story and focused with the right extent (absolutely not exaggerate, but still so that you have no chance to not really notice it).

Oh, and before I forget it: Great story!!!

It was deeply moving. Seeing Aragorn's heroism gave me a positive feeling and took the hopless tone out of the story, but all that sad and cruel and desperate thoghts and thinks in the story got me really emotional.... Which is great, but I think Ineed to do or read something gaily now...


[Is there a reason why you called this story "To save or to salvage" and not just "To salvage", respectively "to save"? I am asking, because my English is to bad that I would get the meaning of it, even though I have been googeling for the diffenece between save and salvage, etc.] 



Author's Response:

Thank you so much for that very thoughtful review!

Regarding your question about the title, I'm glad you asked.  It's a subtle distinction, even for native English speakers.  Basically, it comes down to a difference in connotation.  They have the same denotation (in fact, "to salvage" is usually defined as "to save,"), but they're used in slightly different ways.  "Save," of course, can have any number of usages ranging from "You saved my life" to "I saved a dollar on this shirt."  In this story, though, when I use the word "save," I'm talking about saving lives.  The equivalent word as a noun would be "salvation," which has strong Biblical connotations.

"Salvage," on the other hand, can be used as a verb or a noun.  It's most commonly connected with the idea of marine salvage; after a ship wrecks, you can cut your losses by "salvaging" the cargo, though you usually can't get it all back.  It therefore means something closer to "to recover."  You can save people (or things), but you can only salvage things.  "Saving" can be an altruistic act while "salvaging" is usually motivated by profit.

Which brings me to this story.  Azzam starts out in Ransom thinking he can "save" Aragorn.  He has saved his life, and he thinks he can fix the whole situation by sending Aragorn home and collecting a ransom.  Halfway through this story, he is finally forced to give up on that at which point he enters what we might call a "salvage mindset."  There has been a disaster and he can't put everything back the way it was.  All he can do is salvage the situation and limit the damage.  So, in the end, he chooses what seems like the least bad of several terrible options; he protects himself, his farm, and his family while sending Aragorn away to a fate that *maybe* will not result in his death.

But, here's the cool part:  Aragorn's character arc in this story is the exact opposite of Azzam's.  Aragorn starts out thinking that he's done everything he can do and that his only option now is to limit the damage.  But, then he starts to think about all the people who are directly or indirectly in need of salvation--the Gondorian and Rohirric slaves, Hakim and his family, maybe even Harad itself.  The way I see it, it's not really in his nature to just give up when people need him--not if there's anything he can do to help.  Thus, by the end, he's regained his determination and a sort of internal hope (his "estel," as we might say in Sindarin).  Azzam, who started from a place of altruism, is forced to prioritize his own self-interest, but Aragorn, who started out just trying to protect himself, moves into the more altruistic framework of trying to save others.

:)  Thanks for tolerating my rambling.  I'm so glad you enjoyed this story!  I wish I had a nice, happy fic that I could recommend to help you recover.  Clearly, I need to write more fluffy fics to help my readers survive my angsty fics!

-Brennan


babschwi05/02/13 10:55 pm: RansomAnonymous

I have not much to say, after the brilliant review from Ellyn and Ichbins - they said it all. So, thank you very much for a wonderful story and I'm looking forward to the sequel! It is really sad, that some stories must come to an end.



Author's Response:

Thank you so much!  I hope future works live up to your expectations.

-Brennan


ich bin's05/02/13 08:31 pm: RansomAnonymous

A condign end for a brilliant story. I hate that it is over and that you don't let me "watch" the meal of Aragorn, Hakim and his son, but I think it is (unfortunately) the right ponit to end. I am glad it was a happy end, I had always thoght there would be a happy end, but I sometimes shook with nerves in sympathy for your OCs and Aragorn. (You didn't made it easy for them.) In this chapter (for the firsth time in this story) Aragorn's behavior was somehow strange to me, you explained it well, so that it was in line with Aragorn's charakter well enough, but I cannot imagine his little "show" with Hakim has had that much impact on the Lords. However, he is much more wise than me, so probably it did ;-) Anyways, I somehow liked feeling the tension that was nearly visible in this room and feeling the shakiness Hakim probebly felt, altogh he did great. Oh, and I liked Aragorn's speek and the irony of this one Lord talking about stubborn people who wouldn't change their ways. The sad thing is, that this (like your entire text) is so realistic. Stubborn people complaining about stubborn people, war-used people afraid of peace and people in war afraid of each other (and may hating each other) to much to even think rational... this could have played in nowadays world as well - which is another reason to love your story. Not that every story must have a moral or lesson - your story is defenitly worth reading it, just because it is so exciting and your OCs are so great and Aragorn is so true to himself - but that it could set in this world as well (instead of middle-earth) with little changes is a great bonus.

I might write confused, what I need to say is: Thank you very much for a wonderful story. I love it!

And I look forward to the sequel.



Author's Response:

Thank you so much for one more wonderful review!  I'm glad you enjoyed this wrap-up.  Yes, Aragorn gets a little theatrical here--perhaps overly so.  This was a whole new role for him, and to an extent I wanted him to seem "strange"--to Hakim and to the reader.  He's still feeling out his new political role, so to an extent, he's even strange to himself.  Sadly, you might be right that the effects of his display weren't as great as he probably hoped.  He's starting to change people's minds, but it will be a long process.  This was just the opening salvo.  But, that's a whole 'nother story!  ;)

Thanks again for your thoughtful reviews!

-Brennan


Ellynn05/02/13 09:15 am: RansomSigned

Well, my only objection to this epilogue is that it's too short! Yes, yes, I know, it's only epilogue, and right now Aragorn has other duties so he can't chat with an old friend, but nevertheless, I wish this was longer!

Thank you for this wonderful journey.



Author's Response:

I was so tempted to make this longer and to include all the conversations with old friends catching up . . . I had to resist, though, to keep the tone I wanted.  I'm toying with the idea of writing a sort of "appendix" to this story with those kinds of "deleted scenes."

Thank you for all your support along the way!

-Brennan


Ellynn04/29/13 11:53 am: RansomSigned

Yes, while still reading, I wondered if you'd describe Aragorn's adventures. :)

I like the chapter, especially the last part. There is not much happening - only Hakim's general description of the events, but I love the way you did it. There is some special melancholic, sad tone in it that I like.



Author's Response:

Thanks for reviewing!  I'm glad you liked the tone, especially towards the end.  I hope you enjoy the final wrap-up to this tale.

-Brennan


babschwi04/28/13 11:38 pm: RansomAnonymous

Thank you so much for a beautiful written story! 'Ich bins' review said it all. I especially liked the part about the rumors coming up from the south, showing very clear that Dakheel was alive and 'making a difference'. Looking forward to your update and the next story.



Author's Response:

Thank you so much for reviewing!  I'm glad you enjoyed the part about the rumors.  I went back and forth about how much detail to include for those.  Hope you enjoy the conclusion and the sequel!

-Brennan


ich bin's04/28/13 05:47 pm: RansomAnonymous

Thoroughly great chapter! (Even though you let us wait once again for a talk or something between Aragorn and Hakim, how could you?!) You put the story strings well together.

It somehow made me feel really good, that Hakim tried to free Aragorn, but he didn't want to. I somehow expected, that he would be sold, but able to flee afterwards, however that is so much better. Now we see Hakim finding the strenght and heart to help Aragorn - not in impulse, but knowing what it might bring to him and that he is acting against his fathers wish - and we see Aragorn being a strong hero, who does all this willingly (more or less) for his aim, rather than a broken man who get forced to be a slave. Oh, I cannot even tell you how much confort this means to me (probably to Hakim as well^^). But I don't want to get obsessed with this topic, as there are so much other great things I have to praise. 

I like how you told us, what happend after they seperated. You didn't tell us to much about Hakim, yet we know what is important (for the story) and you told it well. And how you told us about Aragorn (even thogh it was probably hard, because Hakim is the narrator and he doesn't know to much) was very well solved. I can sy myself, that Aragorn did well, but you didn't force Hakim to be there and see something or do something else unrealstic. (But I would love to hear more about Aragorn's time with the slaves, I will keep an eye on your profile) Oh, and how you put in how Hakim gets the sword and Aragorn gets his stuff back was very well done too.

And there, as well as in the other chapters (but I think I forgot to mention it last time) are so much especially good sentences, said by Aragorn or Hakim. I feel that in this chaptere there are more of them than before, wise and somehow grave statements which gave a tone of...severity especially to this chapter, at least at parts. And we could see Hakim's development pretty good. At firsth he was more or less a boy, keen but ingenuous, but when Aragon leaves he understands a great lot and has somehow matured. We see it in the way he acts and talks and it has influence on the style of the story, because he is telling it, and I think it's great how you captured this. Also the difference of the way "old Hakim" is seeing and describing his surroundings and the way "young Hakim" (especially at the beginning) is seeing the world is pretty good worked out. There is no to big gap, as it is still the same person and he is making the narration now in form of recollections, but you can get a difference (or I am imagine it, which is just as fine as long as I like it ;-)

 

I'm looking forward to the epilogue and to more stories! (I think I could read thousands of this/your stories...)



Author's Response:

Thank you so much for another wonderful review!

I'm glad you enjoyed the resolution.  It was very important to me that Aragorn choose his eventual fate.  I don't see him as the kind of character who would tolerate having his agency taken away . . . but he might choose to lay it down in service of a greater good.  I'm glad you appreciated Hakim's character development as well.  It was kind of subtle, but I tried to shape the story around the idea of Hakim coming of age and becoming aware of the greater complexities of the world.

I hope you enjoy the epilogue and my future works!  I'm not sure if I have *thousands* in me, but there are a few kicking around in my head.

-Brennan


ich bin's04/26/13 08:59 am: RansomAnonymous

What a great story!

Your OCs are great, they are all so... "lifelike". Most stories with people from Harad have just the "evil" Harads and maby or one or two "heroic victims" of their own people. Your charakters are neither oft that. They are not perfect, but not bad either. I like how the mother acts and how her attitude towards "the foreigner" chances. I like the father and how in-depth his charakter is - knowing his desperation and his "good sides", you do not see him just as evil person, even thogh it is still no excuse for selling somebody (even the word selling sounds incredibly worng here). I like Hakim an I like reading his thoghts about everything and especially about Aragorn (and I like, that he became healer- if I got that right- he should tell Elessar^^). And I think I like Kali most, even thogh we do not know that much about her, as she is still so little, but you described her acting well and she is cute. Somehow I feel as if this whole family were real.

You (and/or Hakim) also described Aragorn great. Seeing him through the eyes of an Haradrim is really interessting and Aragorn's acting and speeking (heroic, but not superhuman) is how I always imaginated him (which is very importent to me).

The content is also very good. You show us perspectives of Harad, which we didn't had and tell us a little bit more about Aragorn, but mostly you tell the story of a family and especially a youg boy, finding himself in a situation none thoght he/they would ever be and that is maybe changing a lot. Even thogh the situation in Harad is not that good at the moment it was enjoyable to read about this family and thrilling. And there is this "other" little story about Hakim in Gondor and it is a really exciting story and how you put that together with the flashbacks and so on was great.

Oh, I have been fevered waiting for the moment they meet and recognice each other, even thogh I wanted the story to last as long as possible. I could have read so much more about Aragorn there. But I think you chosed a good story length nevertheless.

What I wanted to tell you with this terribly long Reviw is: I love your story! (I could have just wrote that, but now you know or sure that everything is great.) 

I can't wait for Sunday, I want to read about them talking and... oh, I'm so agog. 

Kind regards from Austria! (where I come from, which is the reason for the bad English, sorry by the way)

Until the next chapter;-)



Author's Response:

Thank you for the awesome review!  It had me grinning from ear to ear.  I'm so glad you enjoyed the OCs and found them life-like!  They were my biggest concern going into this, since they carry so much of the story and I've never written so much with original characters before.  My beta (the poor woman) can attest to this; for weeks, I was spamming her inbox with "does this sound okay?  what about this?  would anybody even want to read this?"  But, once it started flowing, I had a lot of fun with just letting the characters do their thing and insert ambiguity into the story.  I'm glad you enjoyed the family and their evolution over the course of the story.  And Kali might be my favorite too.  ;)

 

I'm glad you enjoyed the plot as well, even though some of it is a bit dark.  Believe me, I also cringed every time I had to use the word "slave" or "selling" but the story seemed to demand it.  I'm glad you liked the pacing and that the suspense came through.

 

I hope you enjoy the rest of the story!  Sunday's chapter will be the last "regular" installment while the epilogue that follows will deal mostly with the Gondor storyline.  Thank you so much for the incredibly kind review!

 

-Brennan


babschwi04/25/13 11:46 pm: RansomAnonymous

I can hardly believe you can solve this fine story in only one last chapter. To me you can write on and on and....



Author's Response:

:)  Thanks for the vote of confidence!  I thought about making this longer, but I find I do better when I limit myself to somewhat focused storylines.  This is the longest I've allowed myself to ramble on in some time.  And while there's definitely more that could be said about Aragorn and his travels in Harad, it's nearly time for Hakim's part of the story to wrap up.  I hope you enjoy, nonetheless!

 

-Brennan


No results found.
You must login (register) to review.